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Discussion Topic: MoonGoddess's Diary.
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libbyling |
11-06-2008 @ 5:17 PM
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Member
Joined: Jan 2008
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hi MG
am really sorry you are poorly, when i had this nasty virus a few weeks i didn't want to even think about what i ate so don't beat yourself up ok? hopefully the antibiotics will kick in soon and you will feel better soon, rest as much as you can ok?
take care
libby xx
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jessiesgran |
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11-06-2008 @ 10:24 PM
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Joined: Sep 2008
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Hi MG
i am so sorry you are not well. your Diary was one of
the reasons i joined up to the forum. I hope you feel
better soon.
xxxxJG
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MoonGoddess |
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11-09-2008 @ 10:39 PM
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Joined: Jun 2008
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Thanks for all your thoughts.
I have now been off of Reds for 5 days and it's a revalation. Yes I've started eating again but I'm not actually hungry just rather bored being ill at the moment. However, I'm not such a bumbling fool anymore!
Yesterday I finally told my brother where to stick himself and hoped he would never contact me again. And today the OH and I have the hugest row which I was quite pleased about because I finally told him where to stick himself too. I feel so much better for losing those two dead-weights from around my neck.
The Reds were stopping me from telling them exactly how I feel. Thankfully I managed to tell the OH as it should have been our 16th anniversary on Friday and he didn't want to see me "because I am working", and when I said that I hadn't remembered the date due to being ill he retored with "oh so now that shows me all I need to know - you had forgotten".
So when he said I should go off and find some other bloke I just replied, "You want it - you got it!".
This is the first day of my real life now and I'm feeling so relieved. I just wish the Reds had given me to confidence to do this sooner.
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MoonGoddess |
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11-09-2008 @ 11:25 PM
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Joined: Jun 2008
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I'm just wondering if I should actually go back on the Reds as I found I was quite emotional on them.
Sometimes a tablet making you a more pleasent person is a hinderance. I'm fed up with being nice to people, anyway, you just get walked over and used. Why should I let people do that to me? I shouldn't. Especially with someone I don't even think I love anyhow. I mean, what is love? I don't feel it. If it's butterflies in the tummy and feeling warm and cozy with that person, looking forward to seeing them, enjoying their company, wanting to cuddle up with them, (oh perleeeze! *vomit*) then nope, not felt that for about 15 and a half years.
I'm too independant yet when I could of done with some help while ill, I've got 3 people in my life who all gave varying excuses from "I'm too tired today" to "I only go shopping in the middle of the night", as to why they didn't offer to go shopping for me. I cannot rely on anyone to help yet they all want my help and advice when it suits them. I didn't even bother asking the ex-OH as he wouldn't leave the house after going home from work - even though he cannot stand being stuck with his mum!
So a doormat I will no longer be. I've text the ex-OH that I hope he now has the life he has dreamt of and leave him too it.
To that end, I now have to decide if I need to go back on the Reds again. Afterall, I've no-one to impress now and not interested in having anyone to impress. I was only doing it for him anyway, which he never seemed to notice so it was a waste of time.
I'll let you know what I decide.
This message was edited by MoonGoddess on 11-9-08 @ 11:33 PM
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yo-yoali |
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11-10-2008 @ 8:47 AM
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Member
Joined: May 2008
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Hi
Mel.
First of all well done for getting shut off the other half!
But I have got to say I would go back on the reds.You should never lose weight for someone else it should alway be for you!!!
Just think of the health benefits if you do lose weight and the self satisfaction knowing you have done it for YOU! You are always doing for others and now it's time to do for you.
Take care and hope your throat is better soon
xxx ali
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Macduff |
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11-10-2008 @ 12:34 PM
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Joined: Oct 2007
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What a pallaver (is that how you spell pallaver, i didn't mean pullover)?!
Glad you're feeling a bit better, and I'd back up what Ali says about going back on the reds, this time though, do it for you (every 1lb lost is so much sweeter that way).
Unless of course you don't want to, and then don't go back on them. I wasn't an unhappy "fat girl", just an unhealthy one, I'm still a "fat girl" but I'm now a healthier fat girl 
You do what you want - you deserve it!
Rachel x
This message was edited by Macduff on 11-10-08 @ 12:36 PM
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MoonGoddess |
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11-10-2008 @ 7:11 PM
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Joined: Jun 2008
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Well today I have been back to the doctor because last night I was awake most of the night with a fever again.
I tried getting some sleep this afternoon but just kept coughing everytime I lay down.
I need to eat humble pie.
I really over-reacted to the OH yesterday because I am feeling so ill. The doc told me the anti-biotics I have had to have were extremely strong and that plus the bug plus the total tiredness and removal of reds all built up to a large explosion of emotions. The doc wants me back on Reds by the end of the week and wants me to go back to being settled before ending anything with the OH. He is actually my mum's doc and he has also stated that he wants Social Services to keep mum another week in respite because even if I am better by the end of the week, my body has taken such a bashing, I need time to recover.
My sinuses are all blocked up now with whooshing in the ears and what little is coming out is still slightly infected. I might need another course of anti-biotics. I'm still coughing for England.
I am also totally bored. I read 3 pages of a book and lose interest, watch 20 minutes of a film and get fed up and even considered buying a non-energetic game for the Wii but read the instructions and think "can I really be bothered to play this?"
Yesterday I also lost my sense of smell and taste. Nothing can I taste or smell. A symptom of Chronic Sinasitus. I made a lovely lamb and rosemary cassorole with herby dumpling, mash and shallots and it just was tastless mush. My mouth is full of ulcers and I'm just terribly run down.
I'm in an odd place - bored of being sick and fed up of doing nothing because I have no energy.
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Macduff |
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11-10-2008 @ 7:43 PM
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Joined: Oct 2007
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casserole with dumplings... can i live with you? lol
I think that it's not a bad idea to go back on the reds, and I especially think it's a good idea that social services keep your mom for another week - get yourself better, however long it takes
Take a few days and be selfish 
Rachel x
This message was edited by Macduff on 11-10-08 @ 7:43 PM
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jessiesgran |
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11-10-2008 @ 7:52 PM
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Member
Joined: Sep 2008
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You poor thing you sound as if you need some TLC. Its
rotten feeling like you do. I do hope you feel better
tomorrow. Even if you are unable to do anything nice
for you now perhaps you could plan something?
xxxxxxxxxxxJG
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libbyling |
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11-11-2008 @ 4:29 PM
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Member
Joined: Jan 2008
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hey moongoddess
how you doing today? hope your doing a bit better xxx
libby xx
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