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Discussion Topic: Does he still want me?
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wallywagz |
02-07-2006 @ 10:09 AM
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Joined: Dec 2005
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Have you thought that maybe He wants to break up with you but is too spinelees to be the first to say it?Many men would rather act like bast*rds to deliberately get the girl to lose her temper with them,or fall out of love with them,so when she finally says"that's it,I'm finishing it"it's not him thats the bad guy.It's an easy cop out for them and they come out smelling of roses.
all the best.Jan
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jesse |
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02-08-2006 @ 12:22 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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of course. i have thought of that definately. and i even said ill leave. but he stops me. he switches on the charm. its liek he wants a room mate and not a partner. but he asked me to marry him..? its confusing..
i have said maybe we should call it off..so many times. and he doesnt want it.. he nearly cries..
augh.
but your rite. hes acting like a complete bastard. its not just the lack of sex. its the lack of attention. and watching what everything else in a skirt gets. and its him saying a size 10 woman isnt pretty on the street - coz of her love handles.. nice. what does he think ive got.. ??? :'(
i think hes so into his porn and skanks that he has an unrealistic idea of women.
i havent kept anything i have eaten down.. for 2 weeks now ..because i am so stressed out about weight... and wanting to look the best i can for him ...
i feel awful.. 
i just want to die. being rejected by your family over religious differences. and then being rejected by your fiance' im just not coping with it...
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wallywagz |
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02-08-2006 @ 9:15 AM
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Joined: Dec 2005
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For your own sake,get out of this relationship,he's a control freak,he has you on strings and you dance to any tune he plays,he wants you.......he doesn't want you......he wants you.......he doesn't want you!!!Your not a bloody doll,he can't just pick you up when he feels like playing,then dump you again on a whim.Dont fall for his charm and tears,he may even get a kick out of the fact that you fall for it every time.Take control of the situation,be strong,save yourself before he runs you into the dirt and spoils you for any other guy that wants to love you in the future.My friend's husband treated her like that for 15 yrs before she saw the light,he even admitted after the divorce that he resented her for being so weak,he said she was like a puppy that he would kick yet kept wagging her tail,he said it was like a game to him,he didn't want her but he didn't want anyone else to either,"it's my toy,I'll play with it however I like,but you can't have it".He was obsesed with porn too,even had sex with her while watching another girl on film,then told her that she was repulsive.Your fiance and him are two of a kind.Open your eyes before it's too late.
all the best.Jan
This message was edited by wallywagz on 2-8-06 @ 1:54 PM
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wallywagz |
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02-08-2006 @ 9:20 AM
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Joined: Dec 2005
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By the way,she married a lovely guy only a year later,one that had watched her ex abuse her for years and it it had broken his heart to see it,he fell in love with her before she was divorced but never told her,even though she was 14 stone.He loves her to bits, and now she has 2 little one too.Hope it works out ok for you.xx
all the best.Jan
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realslimlady |
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02-08-2006 @ 11:35 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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This man is abusive. He may not be smacking you around but he's being mentally abusive and that's just as bad. Emotional scars take longer to heal than physical pain. You know what you have to do but you have to be brave. You mention that you have been rejected by your family, is it because of him? Is there anyone you can turn to, such as a friend or even your gp? you are worth so much more than this. Being with someone is supposed to make you happy, all couples have ups and downs but this is one constant down and it is literally destroying you. Please find the courage and leave him. You are a good person and you will be happy, but never with this man. Thinking of you, Lee x.
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jesse |
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02-09-2006 @ 3:59 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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thanks guys.. im jsut waiting till its all hits the fan.. im not strong enough to break away yet..
my family have rejected me because i rejected the religion they bought me up on. im not allowed to speak with them unless its for buisness. i left the religion and most of my friends to be with this guy.
*sigh.
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mrsmcci |
02-09-2006 @ 6:02 PM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Hi Jesse, You have to do whats right for you and in your own time but remember your happiness is paramount so dont neglect yourself and your happiness.
Good luck bud
Karen 
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jesse |
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02-10-2006 @ 4:53 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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 THANKS heaps. you have all been lovely.
ill jsut have to see how it goes.
*sigh.
i keep thinking if we lose weight it will help..
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realslimlady |
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02-10-2006 @ 10:06 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
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I really don't think it's your weight that's the problem here hun. This man may make you believe if you were thinner everything would be rosy but do you really believe that? He'd probably find some other issue then. What you need is to be on your own and discover what it is that you want. If you want to lose weight then good luck but please do it for yourself with no pressure from others. Good luck, Lee
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Lottie |
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02-11-2006 @ 6:06 PM
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Joined: Oct 2005
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Jesse, the other girls are spot on about this guy. He's a control freak which probably comes from low self esteem and he takes it out on you. I'll bet he justifies everything he does by blaming you too. You cannot change this man. You cannot hope that if only you do this thing or that thing then it will tick his boxes and make him happy. Its all about respect and he's got none at all, either for you or himself or he wouldnt treat you this way. Believe me, I know, was in a similar destructive relationship for 9 years before I wised up. Its so hard making that step but once you do you'll never look back.
You aint responsible for him but you are for yourself and your happiness. Dont waste your life on him.
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